You know that old shirt (or other article of clothing) that you have sitting at the top of one of your clothes drawers?
Yup, the same one that you always wear when you want to feel comfortable, when you want to go to the gym, when you wanna go to bed, when you have nothing else to wear…
That’s THE shirt.
It may not be your favorite, and it sure as heck ain’t the best-looking, sexiest, or even the most sane-looking (because let’s face it, there’s a stain on it somewhere that you keep hoping will go away every time you do laundry but it just won’t).
But it’s always there, it’s comfortable, and even though it’s the runt of your wardrobe, you keep it around.
It’s perfect for when you’re feeling lazy, tired, or sleepy.
Why get rid of it? Right?
Can I propose something to you?
Throw the dang shirt out!
Because the same thing you’re doing with that shirt is the same thing you’re doing with your content and copy.
Allow me to explain:
Every time you sit down to write content or copy, you automatically draw on the most convenient, overused, comfortable words - just like that shirt! After all you need to get this done so you can move on to some other business-y task that will increase your productivity.
Yes, I’m calling you out:
You’re being lazy.
Hey, we all do it. No judgement. I do it too.
But when you get lazy and use the same words, the same phrases, the same imagery over and over again (that are also being used over and over again by everyone in the online business world),
here’s what you’re sacrificing:
You’re giving up the most powerful (albeit slow-growing) asset you have to grow your business: connection. You’re passing up the opportunity to connect with the women you want to serve.
Connection is what grows and leads to the sale. The sale leads to referrals and more sales. More sales lead to business growth.
It STARTS with the connection.
And no great relationship ever began with lazy communication!
It's as if you were walking into a job interview or trying to close a client or give a speech IN THAT SHIRT. How do you think that would go down?
It's just not the best move, to put it lightly :)
BUT we all know lazy just doesn’t go away. And you can't just give up the shirt, you can't just toss it in the bin, even if you know you should. Even when we know what’s at stake, procrastination with your content/copy AND with the dang shirt can still be o-so-real. ^_^ (Yes, I speak from experience, lol)
So let’s start simple, shall we?
This is gonna be the 3 simplest steps you can take to right now to massively upgrade the quality and resonance of your content so that you can connect with the women you want to serve:
1. Use emotions
Why? Because women respond to emotions. Heck everyone has emotions, but women relate to the world in a highly emotional way. No, I’m not saying we’re hysterical and can’t control ourselves or act rationally. We just have higher EQ ^_^
When you use emotions, you go from giving information to creating empathy, understanding and provoking curiosity.
For example, read this out loud: This is what happened
Now read this out loud: Ugh! I can’t believe that happened! How did I allow that to happen?
Did you read each of those differently?
That’s because you automatically attached emotion to the words. And now you wanna know what happened don’t you? ^_^
When you don’t use emotion, you miss the opportunity to create heart-to-hear connection - especially if you’re hoping to serve women. When I say heart-to-heart, what I really mean is reverse-empathy, i.e. that moment where they read something you wrote or hear you say something and they respond (consciously or unconsciously) with Yeah, you get it! PREACH! ^_^
Not only do you miss the opportunity for reverse-empathy, you also miss the opportunity to put yourself and her in the same pair of shoes (so to speak). It’s that moment where she hears you say something or sees you read something and she thinks Omggg, you too?!?! Kinda thought I was the only one!
That’s a massively crucial moment - think about it: if you randomly end up sitting beside a woman in the same shoes as you (assuming you notice), you immediately have something in common. It would be awkward NOT to say anything, right?
The trick to making this work is that you can’t simply say I was annoyed at myself.
Attach an action to the emotion and say I really deserved a good solid side-eye for that one. Then you can add (this is optional and only for the sake of the voice in which you’re writing), I was so annoyed at myself.
So translated into coach’s or personal brand’s website copy that might look like:
If you find yourself scribbling different dates in journal, dreaming about the day you finally leave your drab 9-5…
If you can’t wait for the day you leave your 9-5…
See the difference?
2. Use thoughts
Why? Because our thoughts are our constant companions next to our emotions. We’re always thinking something - especially about what we desire and what we’d rather not experience, or do, or what we want to overcome.
When you speak in thoughts, you create this moment of Whoa, it’s like she’s reading my mind! She understands me and my -ish that well? Huh, let’s hear what she has to say about how I can move forward…
THAT, is exactly where you want to be!
And that’s what you give up when you don’t use thoughts in your content and copy.
But again, you can’t just say You think about how you can make more sales all the time… That barely brushes the surface of her attention.
Instead, you say You often find yourself thinking, ‘What else can I do to make these sales? What haven’t I tried?’
Even though that’s a fairly simple example, the shift is still powerful and meaningful for her when she reads or hears you say this.
3. Use physical circumstances
Maybe this one goes without saying? But maybe not, because all too often I review clients’ content & copy and find that they completely neglect to be specific in their descriptions of the physical circumstances of the women they want to serve.
Honestly, I put this one last because it’s the most obvious, but it’s also the one that seals the deal and delivers the delicious buttercream icing on the cake - aka describing their physical circumstances well could close the sale and get you that credit card number you’ve been waiting for.
Well think about it, it’s pretty easy to share common emotions. Emotions are universal.
Even thoughts are somewhat universal - or at least they’re common within cultural and geographic contexts.
Combining thoughts and emotions, that’s good. That narrows down who you’re speaking to significantly.
For example, expressing disbelief at how difficult something was:
One woman might think, Yooooow, I don’t even know how the heck that went.
Another might think, Wow, I can’t believe how hard that was.
Same emotion of disbelief. 2 different women.
But adding physical circumstances to the mix?
That cinches the deal, friends.
If you want empathy, understanding and access (to her heart and her dollars) to last - you need to communicate very specifically about her physical circumstances.
When you don’t, you stay at the level of passing acquaintances, someone she wants to listen to from time to time, someone she may even buy from once or maybe even twice. But a fan? A referee? Nope.
You miss that opportunity if you go with lazy communication when it comes to their physical circumstances.
Again, the trick to this is to be specific. You can’t simply say Your last launch didn’t go so well.
Instead you say You wanted to make at least $10K with your last launch, but it turns out that you barely made one sale and that didn’t even cover half of your ad budget.
Specificity, friends. Specificity.
If you remember nothing else from this blog post, remember this:
It’s not about being the one who says the most and shows up the most often. If you show up the most often in that shirt it's not gonna go the way you hope, believe me!
It’s about the one who understands, who moves hearts and supports the transformation of the women they want to serve genuinely and authentically - not lazily.
With all the changes algorithms and the global competition for attention, you can’t afford to be general. You can't afford to keep wearing that same old shirt - no matter how comfortable it is. This is your message we're talking about! This is the transformation you want to help birth in women's lives!